Under my skin

Everyone that I have the freedom to talk about how she makes me feel about to, will wonder WHY on earth she get's to me so much.

OMH will say "You've known her now for many years and still she bother's you?"

And my mother would just tell me not to LE T her get to me.

But you know what actually annoys me the most??

If my MIL was ANY other person annoying me, hurting me, disrespecting me or degrading me (as she does) I would just say so. I would just come right out and tell them they're being a bitch, or that they're not worth knowing.

But any other person would actually listen to what I was saying, perhaps take it in to account...and maybe even try not to do it any more.

Not my mother in law.

If yesterday when she had told me to SHUT UP I had got up and told her what a fucking bitch she is and told her how she can either learn to respect me or not see me ever again...then we'd never see her again.

And that sounds great. But being the person that I am...I would then spend the rest of my days getting blamed for breaking up the family. And I would then spend the rest of my nights awake actually wondering what *I* had done wrong to cause all of this trouble.

And then my marriage would break down because I wouldn't be able to let it go.

And THAT is why that woman get's under my skin so much. Because I can't say anything, or I break the family up. And if I did say something...she wouldn't listen and it wouldn't make a difference.

What I should have said...or done.

Today, for the first time in a week or two, we visited the evil Mother in Law.

OMH and I had just bought a new bassinet for Baby B and had taken it over to show them.

While discussing this new purchase, MIL started talking about making a blanket for it. And I, being a logical person...thought it best to make a crib blanket. Since when baby B will be born...it will be the middle of summer. And there will be no need for a blanket in the bassinet.

Sorry to be the voice of reason.

So out of the blue she says "I'm HIS grandmother and I can make a bassinet AND a crib blanket if I want NOW SHUT UP!"

I did the right thing. I told her she was being rude and not to tell me to shut up. But she continued to do it.

If I'd not been caught so out of the blue and by surprise I think I might have got up, grabbed Baby A and walked out, telling her that she can be a bitch to whoever she wants but I wasn't going to stand for it.

And OMH would be stuck there with a confused look on his face. Because his all mighty mother is very powerful in her family and well, he doesn't want to get in my bad books. So I might have added to my assault "And YOU grow a pair of ball's and TELL your mother to stop being a bitch to YOUR wife" and walked out.

But of course I didn't. She continued to tell me to shut up if I was telling her not to be rude. I would say "Don't be rude" and she'd say "Shut up" and I'd say "That is so rude" and she'd say "Shut up"

My life is just an ongoing list of things I should have said. But I told OMH tonight that she caught me off guard and I was unprepared for it. If it, or anything like it happens I may not bite my tongue. And why should I? Right??

Fucking bitch.

A funny thing happened...

A funny thing happened.

I started this blog. For no other reason than to bitch about my mother in law.

And then guess what happened??

I figured something out!!!

I figured out that my Mother in Law (and father in law) is a bully. A great big fat nasty BULLY.

And from then on, things have changed.

Not because SHE changed. But because *I* changed.

Because I all of a sudden stopped hearing what she was saying as anything other than "nasty nasty nasty!!"

And, who in their right mind WANTS to be bullied? I for one...don't.

So I figured that the best way to not get bullied (because there would be no quietly having a word with MIL to let her know that she hurts my feelings and drives me batty) is to stay away.

We used to visit every week. Sometimes twice a week. Just because.

Now, I wont go unless I have to.

It's been almost 2 weeks since we visited. And I feel great!